The Way I Played That Day

Kanade's Room

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1

Kanade

Listen

...
2

Kanade

Listen

(I can't go back and change what happened that day...)
3

Kanade

Listen

(There's no use in wanting to...)
4

Kanade

Listen

I have to keep composing.
That's all I can do now...

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5

Ena

Listen

<Huh? K?
You're still working?>
6

Kanade

Listen

Oh...

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7

Kanade

Listen

<Did you already take that bath?>
8

Ena

Listen

<Yeah, I feel pretty refreshed now.
I might actually be able to finish one of my illustrations.>
9

Kanade

Listen

<Okay. I'll be working like normal, so let me know if anything comes up.>
10

Ena

Listen

<Okay, I will.>

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11

Ena

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<Hey, K, I wanna ask you something...>
12

Ena

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<My illustration for the post-chorus feels kinda dark at the moment, but I'm wondering if I should add a little more light... What do you think?>
13

Kanade

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<Well...
...>
14

Ena

Listen

<K...?>
15

Kanade

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<Oh, sorry...
I was thinking about something else, so I couldn't gather my thoughts properly.>
16

Ena

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<Oh, are you talking about your future...?>
17

Kanade

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<It's not bothering me that much, but it does keep nagging at me.>
18

Ena

Listen

<Right...>
19

Kanade

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<But I'm okay...
I feel a lot better after talking with Rin just now.>
20

Ena

Listen

<Wait, with Rin?>
21

Kanade

Listen

<Yes...>
22

Kanade

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<I tried thinking about what I want to do, but I couldn't come up with anything...>
23

Kanade

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<However, there was a time when I really loved music more than anything else...>

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24

Ena

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<Really...?>
25

Ena

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<Can you tell me why...?>
26

Kanade

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<Sure. My happiest memories all seem to involve music in some way...>
27

Kanade

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<My mom and dad always smiled whenever they heard a song that I composed.>
28

Kanade

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<I really loved those moments...>
29

Ena

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<I see...>
30

Ena

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<That explains why your songs feel so warm, K.>
31

Kanade

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<What...?>
32

Ena

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<The memories you just mentioned might be the source of the warmth I feel in your songs. It makes so much sense now.>
33

Ena

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<So, are you gonna keep composing after you graduate?>
34

Kanade

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<Oh, um... Yes.
I plan to keep on composing.>
35

Kanade

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<Especially... Since that's what I need to do...>
36

Ena

Listen

<What...?>
37

Ena

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<Wait, what do you mean...?>
38

Kanade

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<...>
39

Kanade

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<I realized something while talking about this...>
40

Kanade

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<No matter how many songs I do compose, I'll never be able to feel the warmth I did back then ever again...>

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41

Ena

Listen

<Oh...>
42

Kanade

Listen

<I know there's nothing I can do about that now...>
43

Kanade

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<But my dad losing his ability to compose is still my fault...>
44

Kanade

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<That's why I need to keep composing. For him. For everyone.>
45

Ena

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<S-Stop right there for a second!>
46

Kanade

Listen

<Huh...?>
47

Ena

Listen

<What about...>
48

Ena

Listen

<What about your happiness, K?>
49

Kanade

Listen

<My happiness...?>
50

Kanade

Listen

<If I can compose songs that save others, then I'll...>
51

Ena

Listen

<Kanade, listen.>
52

Kanade

Listen

<Huh...?>
53

Ena

Listen

<I know you feel awful about what happened to your dad, but there's no point in beating yourself up...>
54

Ena

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<What I'm trying to say is... I think your happiness is a separate issue.>
55

Ena

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<Personally, I don't want those two things being so closely tied together...!>
56

Ena

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<I mean, you're working so hard for the sake of others...! You deserve to be happy too!>
57

Kanade

Listen

<Oh...>

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58

Kanade's Mother

Listen

Wanting to learn how to write wonderful songs like your father is a beautiful dream.
59

Kanade's Mother

Listen

But I'll be happy as long as you find something that makes you happy, Kanade.
60

Kanade

Listen

<But...>
61

???

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<I agree with what she's saying.>
62

Ena

Listen

<Huh?>

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63

Kanade

Listen

<KAITO...?>
64

KAITO

Listen

<You tried to suppress whatever you were feeling just now...>
65

Kanade

Listen

<What I was feeling...?>
66

KAITO

Listen

<Yes...>
67

KAITO

Listen

<You believe that you're not allowed to be happy. That you have no right to.>
68

KAITO

Listen

<Am I wrong...?>
69

Kanade

Listen

<I...>
70

KAITO

Listen

<What are you always telling Mafuyu...?>
71

KAITO

Listen

<To cherish her feelings.>
72

KAITO

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<I'm okay with you composing songs in order to save others and make them feel happy.>
73

KAITO

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<But I'm not okay with you turning a blind eye to what you're really feeling...>
74

Kanade

Listen

<What I'm really feeling...?>

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75

Kanade

Listen

<B-But...>
76

Ena

Listen

<Actually, Kanade...>
77

Kanade

Listen

<Huh...?>
78

Ena

Listen

<Before you formed N25, and even now... The songs you've composed have helped me so much.>
79

Ena

Listen

<Every time I listen to one of your songs whenever I'm not feeling great... Whenever I wonder if I should continue drawing, the thought of creating art for N25 keeps me going.>

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80

Kanade

Listen

<Ena...>
81

Ena

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<Yeah, I feel pain sometimes when I'm working on an illustration... But I want to keep drawing.>
82

Ena

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<Plus, I've actually started thinking about what I wanna do after I graduate.>
83

Ena

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<I doubt I'd be giving that any serious thought if I hadn't joined N25...>
84

Kanade

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<...>
85

Ena

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<I mean, Kanade.>
86

Ena

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<You're the reason why I'm even thinking about my own future.>
87

Ena

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<It's a small step, but I have something to work towards now...>
88

Ena

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<So, Kanade...
I think you should also do what makes you the happiest.>
89

KAITO

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<If there is something you wish to do, you shouldn't fight against it.>
90

KAITO

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<Because there's no way you'll be able to save her if you don't cherish your own feelings.>

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91

Kanade

Listen

<Oh...>
92

Ena

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<KAITO, wait!
Ugh. He always storms off after saying whatever it is that's on his mind...>
93

Kanade

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<...>
94

Kanade

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(Is it really okay for me to do that...?)
95

Kanade

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(Am I allowed to feel the way I did back then...?)
96

Kanade

Listen

(But I robbed Dad of his future...)
97

Kanade

Listen

(Still...)

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98

Kanade

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(If....it's okay...)
99

Kanade

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If it's actually okay, then...
Next Chapter: The Way I Played That Day